Catholica Bookstore

Bestselling Catholic Books on Amazon.com

Catholic Girls Guide

Do the children of strict parents turn out worse?

I read in a book once that upper/middle class, white, Catholic girls are likely to abuse alcohol. I fit every one of these categories, I'm 16, and I do tend to "abuse" alcohol. I feel that the way my parents raised me has to do with this, I mean they are good parents but they are so strict and closeminded! I've never enjoyed church, I have always wanted to rebel against them. We don't see eye to eye on anything. I think parents should just be a guiding hand, and that they should allow their children to make mistakes so that they can learn from them. But my parents want to keep me from making the mistakes in the first place (which I know is reasonable).
What do you think? Will their parenting be detrimental to me in the end? My therapist always says that I'll probably make a lot more mistakes when I first go to college because I'll finally be off the leash.

Yes. There's been a lot of research on this and the pattern seems to be that the middleground between lax and strict parenting is the most effective parenting style. Strict parenting tends to be counteractive because the kids just want to rebel and when they finally get the chance they go all out. Furthermore, strict parenting fosters a lot of resentment in the kids being subjected to it and as a result they're unlikely to come to their parents for help with anything nor will there be very close relationships between the kids and parents once the children move out of the house. It also tends to not work out as well as strict parents like to think it does because the kids never actually learn life lessons for themselves, they're just forced to adopt certain behaviors that the parents hope will become ingrained. While that's true for some things, it's hardly true for many others.

I've seen this in college. The kids from strict households get drunk with their newfound freedom (both figuratively and literally speaking). Yeah, back when they had their lives micromanaged by their parents they were exemplary kids. But once they're in charge for once all that good behavior and high grades goes right out the window. Another thing I've noticed is that the kids from strict households HATE going back home. They try to avoid it at all costs and complain bitterly when they have to go back. Meanwhile the kids from lax and middle-ground parents don't really complain at all, and will usually go home when the want or need arises.

Whether or not you'll be subject to the same fate due to strict parenting depends completely on you, however. If you have an internal motivation to succeed you'll do well academically in college. If, however, the only reason you get good grades in school is because you have the threat of harsh punishment hovering over you if you get bad grades then you're probably going to go from being an honor roll student to an academic probation student (maybe not to that degree, but you get the picture). Whether you go crazy with social and recreational activities at the expense of academics, work, and other responsibilities also depends on whether or not you're internally motivated to make those things a priority. Whether or not you go crazy with drugs and sex depends on, you guessed it, your own morals on those things.

In the end how you turn out is up to you, not your parents. The big thing to watch out for if you're really worried is your attitudes toward your parents' rules and the things that they make you do and don't let you do. The reason a lot of kids turn out bad (at least at first) from strict parents is because they think things like "Now that I don't have to worry about my parents I'm not going to worry about cleaning up my dorm" or "now that I'm free from my parents I'm going to catch up on all the years of drinking I've missed" or "screw class, my parents aren't going to know I'm slacking off, I've got nothing to worry about". As long as you don't let any resentment you've built up over the years get in the way of being a responsible person you'll be fine.

	Catholicism DVD Box Set List Price: $149.95 Sale Price: $73.95 Used From: $63.95
	We are still working on filling in the product descriptions. If you need more information please call or email us.

	The History Channel Christianity Collection : A History of God , God or the Girl , the Prophecies of Israel : Total 3 DVD BOX SET - 4 Discs
	dvd set

	Lead me, guide me, walk beside me my Lord religious wall quotes arts sayings vinyl decals Sale Price: $12.99
	****Size: 23''w x 5''h****Color: matte black**** Wall sayings and designs are the latest trend in interior decorating and home decor. It is an easy and creative way to add personality and charm to Any Room! Vinyl Lettering is a creative way to transform any room into a stylish, unique space...

	Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: 10 Secrets Every Father Should Know List Price: $14.95 Sale Price: $7.68 Used From: $5.98
	In today's increasingly complicated world, it's often difficult for parents to connect with their daughters-and especially so for fathers. In this unique and invaluable guide, Dr. Meg Meeker, a pediatrician with more than twenty years' experience counseling girls, reveals that a young woman's relationship with her father is far more important than we've ever realized...

	Catholic Prayer Book for Children List Price: $3.95 Sale Price: $1.13 Used From: $0.01
	Prayers, lessons, and truths for young hearts, minds, and souls With colorful, captivating illustrations, the Catholic Prayer Book for Children helps boys and girls discover the beauty of prayer as it encourages them to form a lifelong relationship with God...

Introduction To Catholic Social Teaching: Study Guide $5.95 A study guide with summaries and questions to accompany the book Introduction to Catholic Social Teaching

The Newman Guide to Choosing a Catholic College $19.95 The Newman Guide to Choosing a Catholic College is the first college guide to show students where they can learn and grow in a genuine Catholic environment without the nonsense that has overtaken even some of the most well-known Catholic universities. It includes detailed profiles of more than twenty schools, essential data on each institution, and practical advice from eminent Catholic thinkers, including Fr. Benedict Groeschel, Fr. C. John McCloskey and Peter Kreeft, on how to approach the college decision process. It also tells prospective pupils where to look to find an array of unique and specialized programs. 'Based on extensive research and interviews conducted with complete fidelity to the heart of the Church, and with a contribution from Archbishop Curtiss, The Newman Guide to Choosing a Catholic College is an indispensable volume for anyone wishing to pursue a Catholic college education today.

The Catholic Church and the Bible $11.95 Are Catholics biblical illiterates? So goes the frequent question, proving that myths die hard. But Catholics ought to be able to answer the charge made by many non-Catholics in this regard. This book is a response to Fundamentalist critics and an explanation of the Catholic biblical tradition. The Catholic Church and the Bible is a significant scriptural study guide, published from a Catholic perspective and particularly keyed to the new Catechism of the Catholic Church. The well-planned, straight-forward text is clearly outlined to make information easy to find and understand. Main topics include: - The Catholic understanding of the Bible - God's Word and its purpose in the Church - A biblical theology of the Mass, the place of the Bible in the Sacred Liturgy - A question-and-answer section that deals with pertinent and popular inquiries made by Catholics and non-Catholics alike This work should be heartily welcomed by both clergy and laity, for Father Stravinskas sheds new light on Catholic Bible study by writing with candor, clarity and scriptural backing. This is ideal for high schools and RCIA programs. "An excellent tool for the Catholic apologist. The reader has everything in one place: pithy answers plus biblical and magisterial citations. Fr. Stravinskas is the best priest-apologist in the country." "Karl Keating, Author, Catholicism and Fundamentalism Fr. Peter M.J. Stravinskas is the well-known editor of the The Catholic Answer magazine, a contributing editor to National Catholic Register , and has written over 500 articles for numerous Catholic publications.

The Mission of the Catholic Family $12.95 Each Catholic family has the unique and personal mission to become a community of life and love on their earthly pilgrimage to the Father. The Mission of the Catholic Family provides a road map for the journey through insights on the Holy Family of Nazareth; by seeking God's call to serve Him in the home, Church, and community; and in the developing a family mission statement. Dr. Rick Sarkisian, author of the popular Lifework book and video series, provides practical ways and Catholic wisdom to stay on course while discovering a clear sense of purpose and direction for your family on the pathway to Heaven! "Masterpieces of art don't just happen. They are the result of hard work, planning, dedication. The family is a work of art that God has commissioned to parents. This work of art will be showcased someday in Heaven. Rick Sarkisian has provided the 'Artist's Manual', a practical and easy 'how-to' guide for the Catholic family." "Stephen Ray , Author, Crossing the Tiber ''' For more information on the Lifework Series, click here

The American Catholic Voter $29.95 From the earliest days in the New World through the presidential election of 2000, the influence of Catholics on American politics has followed a peculiar arc. In Colonial America, Catholics were often denied participation in the process; but in the 19th and 20th centuries, the Catholic bloc was recognized as a swing vote that determined the outcome of numerous elections; and today Catholics are either so assimilated or disunited that as a group their impact is declining. ' George J. Marlin traces the political and electoral history of American Catholics from the time of Lord Baltimore and the founding of Maryland to the election of George W. Bush. It is an inspiring story of ethnic Catholics who arrived on America's shores with only the clothes on their back, worked through their parishes and neighborhoods to overcome nativist bigotry, and became a significant voice in local, state, and national political affairs.' '"Nobody knows more about the history of Catholic voters than George Marlin. His book is always informative and sometimes a downright revelation. The American Catholic Voter is certain to be an'instant classic. '" Brad Miner, 'Author, The Compleat Gentleman: The Modern Man's Guide to Chivalry

The Catholic Girl's Survival Guide for the Single Years: The Nuts and Bolts of Staying Sane and Happy While Waiting for Mr. Right List Price: $12.95 Sale Price: $7.45 Used From: $8.21

Finding a spouse has never been easy. But, it’s also never been quite so hard, especially for good Catholic girls intent on having strong Catholic marriages to nice Catholic boys. So what are all those good Catholic girls to do? How do they navigate the increasingly long (and usually trying) years between college and “I do” without losing their sanity or their soul? Consult The Catholic Girl’s Survival Guide for the Single Years: The Nuts and Bolts of Staying Sane and Happy While Waiting for Mr...

	The Catholic girl's guide List Price: $44.99 Sale Price: $15.95